Life Success
For Students With Learning Disabilities:
A Teacher Guide

Presence and Use of Social Support Systems

Both successful and unsuccessful individuals with learning disabilities receive some form of support and assistance from others over the course of their lives.  They frequently speak about the support, guidance, and encouragement provided by “significant others,” such as friends, teachers, therapists, co-workers, and family members.  As one individual shared about her father:

“He really was my greatest champion dealing with school, and he really worked hardest to get me into school, and for that I give him a lot of credit.”

Another adult with a learning disability reflected about an effective educational therapist:

“. . . she worked with me on visualization and memorization, and I think that’s helped me probably the most.  She taught me how to picture something in my head and keep it there, like a word.  That’s something that I still do now.”

A spouse is credited for one man’s success:  “My wife: she’s great.  I couldn’t do it without her by any means.”

However, there are differences between successful and unsuccessful individuals in terms of support systems.  To begin with, as successful individuals move into adulthood, they attempt to reduce their dependence on others.  In many instances they are able to switch roles with people who provided them with support in the past, finding themselves assisting and encouraging those who once helped them.  In contrast, unsuccessful persons with learning disabilities frequently are unable to “cut the cord” as they transition into adulthood and end up remaining highly dependent on others.  For example, a 35-year-old described his continued dependency on his family as follows:

“My parents built a guesthouse for me.  They built a mother-in-law addition to their house.  I live in their guesthouse on their property.  Basically, I keep it clean but that’s about it.  My car insurance is paid for by my parents.  They buy the food.”

Furthermore, the people who have provided support to successful individuals with learning disabilities generally hold clear and realistic expectations regarding life goals and outcomes for the people they supported, and guide them to identify realistic goals without being harsh or critical.  They are also able to help them change directions in attempting to achieve goals, or modify the goals, if necessary.  They are consistent and steadfast in their functioning as sounding boards for reality testing.  A successful adult with learning disabilities described the support from a workplace mentor:

“I guess you could say he rescued me. I was working at this place and going nowhere; probably getting canned.  I only had a couple of more months of work and he was able to take me out of the division I was in and put me back working on mini-computers. That made me very happy. He taught me a new programming language to work in and really helped me out. He’s one of the reasons I own this place.”

Finally, successful individuals with learning disabilities actively seek the support of others, rather than simply wait for someone to come to their aid when they need assistance.  They take the initiative to get help and are willing to accept help when it is offered.  One former student shared the following college experience:

“It was midterms.  I wasn’t getting C’s, I was getting D’s and F’s.  I looked like I was going to have to drop out.  If I was going to drop out, that . . . would have been the end of the world for me.  That was a real difficult year.  I made a recovery.  Systematically, I talked to my teachers, I talked to friends, and they helped me through that very difficult situation.”

By contrast, unsuccessful individuals are not as likely to actively seek support or accept it when offered.

Next: Emotional Coping Strategies